love letter 02: How to Romanticize Your Life Like a Nancy Meyers Movie

I don’t know what’s going on, but there’s a full-blown Nancy Meyers appreciation moment happening on the internet right now—TikTok specifically—and personally? I couldn’t be happier.

Nancy has written, produced, and directed some of my favorite films—movies that have been my comfort movies since high school. Romantic comedies centered around middle-aged women, wrapped in an aesthetic that the girls today are obsessed with recreating.

And listen, I love The Nancy Meyers Aesthetic—the bright, airy kitchens, the oversized sweaters, the effortlessly elegant Hamptons homes. But as an indie filmmaker, my admiration goes so much deeper than that.

Yes, the aesthetic is chef’s kiss. I love that you can spot a Nancy Meyers film just by the interiors—because she has such a defined, signature look. But what I love most about her movies?

It’s how they feel. The scripts were so good, the scenes shot beautifully, and ugh—just… the thought of a woman having that much creative control over her projects in Hollywood?

Goals.

Nancy Meyers films have always been my cinematic equivalent of a warm hug. I used to put them on at bedtime in high school just to soothe me to sleep—because they just felt so good.

It’s Complicated, The Holiday, Something’s Gotta Give, What Women Want—don’t get me started! Diane Keaton! Meryl?? Please! And as a girl growing up on Long Island, seeing these stories set in New York City or out east in The Hamptons? That was extra special.

Wait!

I’m having another epiphany!

Is this why I turned out to be a delusional lover girl?

I grew up in an era where so many of my favorite early 2000s romantic films were set in New York City, and hip-hop was simultaneously having a moment where all the rappers were giving us love songs—and guess what? So many of those music videos were shot in New York, too!

Is that why I thought that after college, I was gonna move to the city, become the main character, and live out my best rom-com life in real time?

…It could be.

Well, here I am, doing it anyway.

And okay, fine, I’m no longer living in New York (technicalities!), but I do live in a small town that looks like a Hallmark movie set, so that works too—especially at Christmas, when I fully commit to pretending I’m in a Lifetime holiday movie (as I should!).

Although, truthfully? My movie would actually be a collaboration between Nancy Meyers and Spike Lee—with Spike definitely handling the soundtrack.

Because yes, I love a coastal grandmillennial moment, but let’s be clear—I’m also the one wearing African bracelets while reading a book on Black history, or writing my own romance stories centered around Black women.

While Nancy gave us a lot, diversity wasn’t one of those things—and that’s okay. I don’t need that from her when we have so many Black storytellers who are giving us what we need.

Anyway… if you’d like to join me by tapping into this version of Main Character Energy, here’s how we’re gonna do it. Even without a sun-drenched Hamptons beach house or a romantic run-in at a Parisian café, we can romanticize our own lives—making every day feel like the kind of story worth telling.

5 Ways to Make Everyday Feel Like a Nancy Meyers Movie

1. Romanticize Your Home Like It’s a Movie Set

Nancy Meyers knows how to make a house feel like a whole vibe. Every detail—from the soft, ambient lighting to the stacks of well-loved books—creates a feeling of warmth, nostalgia, and intention.

What I love most about the homes in her films is that they feel lived in. Classic in style, often with a coastal touch, but never like a showroom. They’re beautiful, but they’re also comfy.

Bringing this energy into real life looks like:

Lighting candles at sunset—even if it’s just for you.

Fresh flowers on the counter—why wait for someone else to buy them for you? And this doesn’t have to be expensive! I grab flowers from the supermarket and make my own bouquets all the time.

Soft jazz or classic R&B playing while you cook—because why shouldn’t you feel like the main character in your own kitchen? When I post my cooking videos on Instagram stories, someone always DMs me about the music. 9 times out of 10, I’ve got Anita Baker playing, or maybe John Coltrane, Duke Ellington, or—let’s be real—Jagged Edge (you know Promise is my jam). There’s just something about cooking to a good song, candles flickering, the whole mood set.

Throw blankets, mood lighting, and cozy textures everywhere—because comfort is an aesthetic.

Your home doesn’t have to be perfect—it just has to feel like you. You know those houses when people want in and comment on how much the house feels like the person who lives there - that’s the goal. Perhaps you’re not into The Nancy Meyers aesthetic, but whatever you’re into it - go all the way with it.

2. Dress the Part—For Yourself

The women in Nancy Meyers films don’t just get dressed—they float through life in effortless neutrals, cozy knits, and breezy linens. There’s a reason we all feel something when Diane Keaton is wrapped up in a turtleneck, sipping wine by the ocean.

Because let’s be real—Carl Thomas wasn’t the only one who gave us an unforgettable moment in a cream turtleneck, OK?

So, how do we bring that energy into real life?

Wear your favorite loungewear while journaling or baking—because feeling good in your clothes shouldn’t be reserved for special occasions. Home is an event too! So is grocery shopping, etc..

Throw on a chunky sweater or silk robe while sipping coffee—because why shouldn’t your morning routine feel cinematic?

Find your signature scent—something warm, inviting, and uniquely you. Speaking of which, I have my eye on some Kay Ali scents that I am thinking of stealing from my sister. I’ll be sure to keep you updated on that.

Because when you look like the main character, you feel like the main character.

3. Savor Slow, Intentional Meals

photo credit: It’s Complicated

Food in a Nancy Meyers film isn’t just food—it’s a whole experience. The crackle of bread being torn apart, the steam rising from a homemade dish, the way a meal feels like a moment, not just a necessity.

So how do we bring that into real life?

Make cooking feel like an act of love—even if it’s just a grilled cheese. The music and candles seriously help with this. And I don’t know about you, but for me, setting the vibe has made cooking feel less like a chore—especially since I can easily spend the entire day in there feeding all the people who live here.

Set the table, even for yourself—because every meal deserves a little romance. And personally? I love setting the table. It’s one of my favorite things to do—I have a ridiculous amount of videos to prove it. It feels like a meditation. The way I’m obsessed with tablecloths, flatware, placemats? Oh my god. And don’t even get me started on creating a centerpiece. Pure joy. Even if it’s just me at the table or counter, I’m making it cute.

Eat without distractions—no scrolling, no rushing, just you and your plate. Phones aren’t allowed at my table. This gives us all a moment to actually connect with each other, and we use our dining table every single day—even if it’s just chicken nuggets with the kids.

Try a new recipe just for fun—because food is a love language. Another thing that has made cooking feel less like a chore for me is looking at it as a source of creativity. I love experimenting in the kitchen, and honestly? Nothing beats seeing my family’s reactions when I get them to try something new.

Because at the end of the day, your kitchen isn’t just where you make food—it’s where you create memories.

photo credit: It’s Complicated

4. Embrace the Art of Stillness & Creativity

Nancy Meyers movies remind us that quiet moments are just as powerful as the big ones. A woman sitting alone, writing in her journal, a candle flickering beside her, the sound of rain outside—tell me that isn’t a whole vibe.

And if you really want to pretend you’re in a rom-com, you have to stare dramatically out the window as it rains, wrap your arms around yourself like you’re in deep reflection, or sit by the window with a piping hot cup of tea or hot chocolate.

Ladies, we have to commit to the main character vibes.

In real life, this looks like:

Carving out time for creativity—whether it’s writing, reading, painting, or just being. Nancy stocks bookshelves in her movies for a reason—she wants us to be reading!

Journaling as a ritual—because your life is your story to tell. As a lifelong journaler, I am so grateful I’ve been documenting my life since I was nine. There are so many small moments, conversations, and feelings I would have forgotten if I hadn’t made journaling a part of my day. It’s great for prayer, for dreaming, but also for record keeping—because life’s details deserve to be remembered.

Letting yourself be alone without feeling lonely—because solitude is a love letter to yourself. (And yes, this is another perfect opportunity to wrap your arms around yourself on the couch with a thick throw blanket—commit to the moment!)

Taking slow walks, sipping tea, and just existing—no agenda, no rush, just you.

Sometimes, the most beautiful moments aren’t the loud ones.

They’re the ones you quietly savor.

photo credit: It’s Complicated

5. Let Romance Exist in the Everyday 

Romance in a Nancy Meyers film isn’t just about relationships—it’s about how life itself can feel romantic.

That’s exactly how I want you to see your own life. To not just play the part with aesthetics (though that’s fun too), but to truly romanticize your everyday—not for the sake of appearances, but for the joy of it.

That means:

Being kind to yourself.
Finding several things to be grateful for each day.
Giving God praise for waking you up, for giving you another day to live your most authentic, creative, and fun-filled life.

To create this in your own world:

Write love notes—to yourself, to your dreams, to the life you’re building.

Speak softly to yourself—with kindness, with gentleness, with grace. No seriously, be nicer to yourself.

Keep a gratitude journal before bedtime.

And don’t save things for a “special occasion”—today is the special occasion.

God woke you up this morning. If that’s not reason enough to celebrate, what is?

Let love be a language you live in, not just something you wait for.

Your life is already a love story.

You just have to start seeing it that way.

Final Thoughts: The Romance of Real Life

At the heart of every Nancy Meyers film is a feeling—one of warmth, beauty, and a life well-lived.

And when I think about the feeling I want to have every single day? These movies capture it.

More than ever, we deserve to feel good. Because there is so much happening outside of us that we can’t control. Scroll social media for five minutes, and it’s a constant loop of bad news, fear, and—seriously, what is going on with the price of eggs?!

Because the 60-pack I normally buy for $15 was suddenly $20 last week.

But I digress.

((Deep breaths.))

I don’t want to be pissed off.

While we have no control over what’s happening out there, we are responsible for cultivating our own joy, in here :: points to your heart and then your head ::

Now more than ever, we should be pouring into ourselves, our loved ones, our faith, our creativity, and our homes. Creating spaces that feel like sanctuaries—where we can tune out the noise, nourish our bodies and souls, and surround ourselves with love.

Where we can cook meals that feel like care, gather our favorite people, rewatch the movies that make us feel something (I’m literally watching Notting Hill as I write this), and simply exist in the fullness of who we are.

Because if we’re going to romanticize life, it has to start right here—in our hearts, in our homes, in the way we choose to live every single day.

With love & intention,

Jhéanell

Let’s Chat:

What’s one small way you romanticize your own life—whether it’s a cozy ritual, a favorite meal, or a song that makes you feel like the main character?

If your life were a movie, who would direct it—and what kind of soundtrack would it have?

What’s a film, book, or aesthetic that has shaped the way you see and experience the world?

Are you into Nancy Meyers? Which is your favorite movie of hers?